We’re just over 24 hours into the war, and let us tell you, we are surprised and delighted by the number of Soldiers and Demomen brutally slaughtered so far—the life mercilessly choked from their bodies by your bare hands, much like the air mercilessly squeezed from the inflatable mattress you flattened out after your relatives stayed over for the holidays.
You’d think this would sate our bloodlust. Our on-site developmental psychologist certainly did when he suggested this event. But all we can think of when we look at those big beautiful numbers (2,985,323) is MORE.
Luckily, you can help. Contribute to the war effort by designing a propaganda poster focused on the brave/cold-hearted Soldier/Demomen and his heroic/cowardly fight against the square-jawed/craven Soldier/Demoman—thus inspiring new casualties and feeding our all-consuming thirst for war.
DID WE MENTION PRIZES?
We should have! Because that is what you’ll get if you win.
FIRST PRIZE is a one-of-a-kind in-game item—the most prestigious and unique item ever to grace the game of Team Fortress. Not only will it be awarded to you and you only, we will name it after you and even ENGRAVE YOUR NAME on it, so even if someone manages to steal it, you’re still the boss! (Don’t forget to submit the following as part of your entry: "If I win, my prize shall be irrevocably be named YOUR NAME'S COOL ITEM, and I am fine with that.”)
SECOND AND THIRD PRIZES won’t be nearly as cool as the first prize, but will ALSO be one-of-a-kind in-game items (just not as good). That’s how prizes work. Look it up sometime.
As if that weren’t enough, 25 RUNNERS-UP will get the MANN CO PRIZE PACKAGE, which isn’t one-of-a-kind but is nonetheless free. That’s 25 more free things than we got today. Food for thought.
But wait! Against all the rules of contest creation, there is STILL MORE! Because even if you don’t win ANY of the prizes listed above, Gabe Newell might take a liking to your poster and AWARD SOME POINTS to the side of your choice in the Soldier/Demo War. Is this fair? No! Does Gabe care? Not even slightly!
Winners will be announced Wednesday and gallery of entries shown then. Get creative and GOOD LUCK!
Thank you for your submission.