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You voted. We counted the votes. More accurately, we watched while a computer programmed to count votes counted all the votes. Then, just when we were thinking it had been a while, and maybe the computer was broken, bam. It spit out a card with the 2013 Saxxy nominees punched into it. Then it spit out confetti. Then it self-destructed from all the pageantry. Then—you know what, there were about thirty-seven more things that happened, but we're looking at them now and most of them involve us trying to fix the vote-counting computer, so let's skip to the part where the nominees are live, at sourcefilmmaker.com, for your viewing pleasure!
We've also posted a list of this year's Honorable Mentions, so give them a look too! Or, if you don't feel like reading, why not wait for the honorable mentioning robot to come to your town and read them to you as part of his cross-country Honor Mentioning tour? Nevermind, he just broke trying to open the door.
"'Who here likes good times?' asked David Copperfield as he removed his shirt and popped a whistle in his mouth with the words GOOD TIMES etched in its side. He began tooting on the whistle, signaling the beginning of the good times."
So begins Charles Dickens' feel-good sequel to The Tale of Two Cities, the 800-page Bleak House (a printing error that misspelled the book's original title Good Times Beach House). Day Two of our Two Cities Update picks up in the spirit of Dickens with 100% good times-dedicated announcements: A new animated short, another new map, some more achievements, and some long-anticipated upgrades.
"It was the best of times. It was the best of times."
So opens Charles Dickens' feel-good surf classic Super Good Times, and Dickens' words are as true today as they were at the beach cabana where he wrote them: The best of times, you guys. Let's have some.
Presenting a first-day tease of our imminently-releasing Two Cities Update, including new maps, new achievements, and new effects-generating loot.
The Oscars sputtered out after only two years, the Grammys are of course fictional, and the Stanley Cup has yet to be awarded to anybody. That means that with the Third Annual Saxxy Awards, we will officially be the longest-running awards event of all time. Help us make history by voting, from now until midnight PST on November 24th!
And if voting wasn't exciting enough, how does sending people to jail sound? Because that's what you'll be doing by helping us police the entries for following the rules. Filmmakers will rot in jail on your say-so! In fact, the lawyers tell us they've updated the SFM license to also include an ancillary license to kill! And hold on, there's even more late-breaking news, because the lawyers are now telling us--are in fact typing this right now--that the SFM does not grant you the right to kill and you can't send anybody to jail. Okay, the lawyers stopped typing. I know we're all pretty angry about this turn of events, but we still do need your help checking entries for rule-breaking.
Nominees will be revealed on November 25th and the winners of this year's Saxxy Awards will be revealed on November 26th, so get voting and watch sourcefilmmaker.com for more details!
Ahoy, buoys and gulls, it’s almost Docktober 31st, and that means it’s time for the Fifth Annual Team Fortress Tort-urous Halloween Special, which this year is based entirely around the terrifyingly complex legal questions that haunt maritime law. AWOOOOOOOO! [Sound of receiving a jury summons]
And that horrifying description of an obviously terrible idea for a Halloween update — an idea so dreadful that we gave up on it almost fourteen hours ago — was just the FIRST of this year’s many spine-chilling, spine-tingling, all-around spinal cord-injuring shocks. We have one word of advice to those of you who survived our previous four Halloween Specials: Stop lying. These updates will kill you — GUARANTEED! [sound of our lawyers reading that sentence]
This year's Scream Fortress map is Helltower, a Payload Race variation, with at least one major difference: You're all powerful magicians. Everybody gets a spellbook gifted to them automatically, which you can equip in your Action Slot in order to pick up and cast spells. The team that wins the race will be granted a buff for the final climactic battle, where you will fight for the ultimate Halloween reward: Your own lives. And a reward.
So, fear fans, it’s time to put aside your precious laws of the sea, because this year anything can happen. Ghosts? Yes! Forbidden magic? Yes! Skeletons? Oh, yes. A Hellmouth? Obviously. A corpse? Yours. Really? Check your pulse. The murderer? You. Anyway, we’d love to sit here and shock you to death all day, but the update’s live.